tink3rb3ll1036@yahoo.com MY EMAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
.........BEING A PUPPET FOR A "HIGHER BEING".........BEING WEAK IF I DON'T GET ENOUGH...........WASTING EVERY LAST BIT OF ENERGY I HAVE........READY TO KILL THOSE WHO MAKE ME ANGRY..................WHEN WILL I BE PUT TO REST?
HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'S MY NAME IS CYNTYA ITS SAID WITH AN "H" HEHE MY MOMS FAULT. IM IN HIGHSCHOOL HAVE LOTS OF FREINDS, RANDOMLY HYPER AND FULL OF ENERGY, LOVE ANIMALS/POETRY/MUSIC/WRITING STORIES/WRITING POEMS/READIN/FRIENDS/FAMILY/CANDY/ANYONE OR ANYTHIN THAT CAN MAKE ME LAUGH. I'M OPEN TO ALMOST ANYTHING, I HATE PREPPY GIRLY STUFF AND TOO MUCH PINK IT'S YUKY!!!!!!! OH AND WHEN PEOPLE CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT LOOKS THERE IS NO POINT EVERYONE IS THE SAME ON THE INSIDE AND SOME PEOPLE ARE PRETTY TO COVER HOW UGLY THEY REALLY ARE. LOOKS MEAN NOTHING TO ME ESPECIALLY MY OWN. I'M INTO ALL TYPES OF MUSIC AS LONG AS IT HAS EMOTIONS AND FEELINGS IN IT OR IT MAKES ME WANT TO DANCE EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT THAT GOOD *giggles*. I CAN BE SHY, SUPER HAPPY, TIRED, AND CHILDISH SOMETIMES, BUT IT'S FOR FUN ANYWAYS HOW BORING IT IS TO BE SERIOUS A LOT. EVEN THOUGH I SAY THAT I CAN BE SERIOUS WHEN IT'S NEEDED. YOU SHOULD NEVER EVER MAKE ME MAD. WORSE THING TO EVER DO IN YOUR WHOLE LIFE, NOT KIDDING. YOUR LIFE MIGHT TURN TO HELL IF YOU EVER DO AND TRY TO TALK WITH ME AND THEIR WILL BE PEOPLE WHO WOULD WANT TO HURT YOU. I UNDERSTAND LOTS OF THINGS SO I CAN WITH ANY PROBLEM YOU HAVE OR IF YOU JUST WANT SOMEONE TO TALK TO ABOUT IT. I'LL HELP AND COMFORT YOU AS MUCH AS I CAN. BECAME KIND OF EMO-ISH (EVEN IF SOMEONE SEEMS HAPPY DOESNT MEAN THEY ARE COMPLETELY). OOOOOO IM KIND OF VIOLENT IN REAL LIFE AND I LOVE HUGS AND TEDDY BEARS!!!!! HATE BEING TIKLED (WEAKNESS)!!!!!!*giggles* HMMMMMMM I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE SO IF YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT ME JUST ASK ME K? *smiles*.
this is a song for everyone i havn't helped, want to help, hurt on accident.i'm not selfish in any way but i am fake. i never deserve anyone in my life.the song is perfect for part of my life. i am glad i found it plus its by one of my favorite bands.

ME!!!! KINDA HAHA IVE GOT LONG BLACK HAIR THATS 2/3 OF MY BACK AND BANGS THAT COVER 2/3 OF MY FACE
DEDICATED TO MY PROTECTOR/SECOND HALF/BEST FRIEND-HE'S SOMTIMES AN ASS AND TRIES TO BE CONTROLLONG BUT ITS FOR MY OWN GOOD. ONLY PERSON IN THE WHOLE WORLD THAT TRUELY KNOWS ME UNDERSTANDS ME AND LOVES ME COMPLETELY AND I FEEL THE SAME WAY TOWARDS HIM. HE PISSES ME OFF MOST OF THE TIME BUT THINGS ALWAYS GET BETTER TOWARDS THEN END......HE SHOWS HIS EMOTIONS RARELY BUT ID DONT CARE CAUSE I KNOW HOW HE FEELS WITHOUT ME TELLING HIM AND HES THE SAME WAY WITH ME. ^^
DEDICATED TO MY SECOND PROTECTOR/BEST FRIEND-HE'S ALSO SOMETIMES AN ASS AND TRIES TO CONTROL MY AND AGAIN ITS FOR MY OWN GOOD......DON'T GET WHY HE CARES SO MUCH THOUGH.....(HE SOMETIMES HOLDS ME LIKE THAT TO TRAP ME IF I WANT TO LEAVE EVERYONE AND GO SOMEWHERE BY MYSELF OR IF HE FEELS HE ISNT DOING A GOOD JOB ON KEEPING ME SAFE OR KNOWS IM NOT IN A GOOD MOOD SO TRIES TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER......I TRY TO GET AWAY BUT IT DOESNT WORK ESPECIALLY WHEN HES SERIOUS.....SUPER SERIOUS ILL BITE HIM SO HE'LL LET GO BUT HE JUST CHASES ME WHEN I GET AWAY SO MOST OF THE TIME I JUST STAND UNTIL HES DONE OR WANTS TO LOOK AT ME THEN START TALKING)
A POEM I RANDOMLY THOT OF HEHE:you loved me you hated me, you broke my heart into a thousand pieces and mended it back together. you easily hurt me everyday, you had complete control of me. now you'll be the one to suffer, but the thing is i won't come back to you. i'll leave you with nothing......nothin, but the bitterness and hatred built inside me for all these years. you said that you loved me and you just did all that to me like nothing. to end your suffering by death wouldn't be enough for me so i'll torture you until the time is right, then when you truely realize how much you need me that is when i show you mercy. i'll spare your life, but make you disappear from mine and my memory. a new love will come to me and he'll treat me the oppisite of what you did. you will never know what it is like to be loved by me. ANOTHER 1:my heart slowly being filled with darkness and turning to grey. i once thought i loved, but never did i love anyone truely. my whole life was just a waste of time for the earth. never knowing my own true emotions wasn't thought to be painful enough so god made it so i could suffer more with the power noone would understand. i don't blame him.......i don't blame anyone at all. all i want is to be se free from this torturess life and to never be reborn. i will become the most loved and be surrounded by people that love and care for me, but i'll be alone no matter what they do or say. born to be alone and for one purpose that is never to be told. i'll ony have peace when i sleep and never wake up..........death is at any corner anyways. ANOTHER ONE 2/28:unforgetable images run through my mind......good and bad but still over powered by the dark thoughts that lurk in my head. thoughts of death pain torture.......when will the most painful time pass so the good will come......if it ever comes.......pain from others and my own......how can all this manage to control most of my life and how do i end it? thoughts of suicide come to me everyday.....thoughts of unwanted rebirth comes to mind behind my false happiness. faking most of my emotions, lying to those i "love", keeping the true me hidden for an eternity.......*sighs* how i wish for my death and how i wish for a false world that can never be brought even with what i do.....
poems by my favorite rapper who should be called a messenger of his death R.I.P TUPAC SHUKAR you deserve to be alive.....
[I Cry by Tupac
Sometimes when I'm alone
I Cry,
Cause I am on my own.
The tears I cry are bitter and warm.
They flow with life but take no form
I Cry because my heart is torn.
I find it difficult to carry on.
If I had an ear to confiding,
I would cry among my treasured friend,
but who do you know that stops that long,
to help another carry on.
The world moves fast and it would rather pass by.
Then to stop and see what makes one cry,
so painful and sad.
And sometimes...
I Cry
and no one cares about why.
////////////////////////////////
And Tomorrow by Tupac
Today is filled with anger, fueled with hidden hate.
Scared of being outkast, afraid of common fate.
Today is build on tragedies which no one want's to face.
Nightmares to humanity and morally disgraced.
Tonight is filled with Rage, violence in the air.
Children bred with ruthlessness cause no one at home cares.
Tonight I lay my head down but the pressure never stops,
knowing that my sanity content when I'm droped.
But tomorrow I see change, a chance to build a new,
build on spirit intent of heart and ideas based on truth.
Tomorrow I wake with second wind and strong because of pride.
I know I fought with all my heart to keep the dream alive.
/////////////////////////////////////////
Fallen Star by Tupac
They could never understand
what you set out to do
instead they chose to
ridicule you
when you got weak
they loved the sight
of your dimming
and flickering starlight
How could they understand what was so intricate
to be loved by so many, so intimate
they wanted to see your lifeless corpse
this way you could not alter the course
of ignorance that they have set
to make my people forget
what they have done for much to long
to just forget and carry on
I had loved u forever because of who you are
and now I mourn our fallen star.
///////////////////////////////////
A young heart with an old soul by Tupac
How can there be peace?
How can I be in the depths of solitude
When there are two inside of me?
This duo in me causes the perfect opportunity
To learn and live twice as fast
As those who accept simplicity...

ME N MY BIG BRO VISHUSKAHN-he's a great big bro i love him very much and we have a lot in common mostly when it comes to our poetry
ME N MY BIG BRO JAMES-he's an awsome understanding big bro we love each other very much and have a strong connection between us and have a lot in common
ME N MY BIG BRO DMCKING999-hehehe an awsome big bro who's caring funny and very sweet i love him very much
ME N MY BIG BRO TRAVIS35-awsome big bro i love very much
MY NEW BIG BRO REDFOXFIVE-awsome funny caring big bro we have a ot in common get along very well and can have the wierdest conversations with sometimes hehe even though he's a new big bro i love him as well
ME N MY BIG SIS ANGEOUDEM0N-hella awsome big sis who's like me and gets crazy like i do she's caring sweet and super funny i love her big time
ME N MY LIL SIS FADE-hahahahaha this is such an awsome lil sis she is exactly like me hehe i love very much
ME N MY LIL SIS ZOMBIELOAN-cool sis i barely get to talk with
ME N MY BEST FREND MOONANGEL-she is awsome sweet caring and emotional even if she doesnt show it much me and her have a lot in common and care about each other very much i love her too
ME N MY M BEST FREND RACUNO20-well this guy is super funny and sweet he's like an older brother but more then that at the same time he's like my protector since he doesnt like people messing with me and cares about how i feel everyday hehe i love him very much
MY BEST BUDY IN REAL LIFE PHYCOPORCELIANDOLL-psycho people you're in for a challenge if you think you can go against her hehehe we have a lot in common mostly personality wise bbut im still way more different then her she shows her demonic side more then i do but thats because she doesnt have the samething as me hehe she thinks it scary when im mad and hates when i want to kill someone or when im sad hehe i love you kwistin
EVERYONE WANTS TO KNOW WHAT LOVE IS......TO KNOW AND UNDERSTAND IT........THOSE IN LOVE, THOSE WHO HAVE LOVED, THOSE WHO ARE LOVED, AND THOSE WHO CAN FEEL IT MIGHT KNOW. CAN ANYONE TRUELY UNDERSTAND IT THOUGH......LOVE A NEVER ENDING FEELIN THAT IS TAUGHT FROM PERSON TO PERSON.........CAN EASILY CAUSE PAIN AND JOY............SOMEONE NEEDS TO TEACH THIS YOUNG FOOLISH GIRL (MEANING ME) WHAT LOVE IS AND IF SHE IS ABLE TO FEEL IT......